a cheeseburger would be great right about now..

Back again.
My son's "party supplies" for his 1st birthday came in today. I've probably spent(will spend) more than necessary for such an occasion, but it's important to me. And I want it to be memorable. I can't believe he's almost 1 year old. It's ridiculous. It seems like it was only yesterday I was laying in a hospital bed. In labor. For 34 hours. And then finally taken into the O.R. for a C-section. Yeah, it took A LOT to get him here, but he's soo worth it. He's such a cute kid. I wish I could get him into modeling or pageants or something. I could be one of those awesome pageant moms. Giving him spray tans and paying $10,000 for new clothes. Getting his teeth whitened at 2 yrs old and putting him on a strict diet of sugar free gum and celery. (no offense to pageant moms out there, im just playing) (and for those of you who do things so ridiculous.. I have no words..)

Still looking at houses. Who knows if they'll even be there by the time we're actually able to buy! That's the annoying part! We have some other things to finish up before we actually buy a house. I hate wasting real estate agents time (kind of) but there are some houses that I like on the outside so much I want to see what the inside looks like. So sue me. Hopefully the one we really want is still on the market when we're actually able to buy it.

My best friend leaves in two months. She is moving 5 1/2 hours away. Ridiculous. I'm happy she's getting married and getting everything she wants, but it still blows. Once she's gone.. it'll be me and only me. Friends are few and far between for me. I don't get along well with others. They either annoy me, don't understand my sense of humor or sarcasm, or I just flat out don't like them. And there's no one like my bestie. It's hard to find someone with such a sense of cynicism as mine! And who lives in a dream world for the most part..

My head hurts.
I hope this chantix works. I have one cig left and that's scary to me. I hope I can actually quit this time.. but then again I don't want to. I wish I'd never started in the first place, but there's nothing I can do about that now. Other than quit.

I'm starving. I've had a total of mabye 700 calories today. 2 Slimfast drinks, a salad, a 100 cal. granola bar, and a 100 cal. bag of popcorn. I'm starving. I think that's why my head hurts.

I'm headed to bed. That little boy will be waking me up around 7 or 8 in the morning, and I'll be dead tired. Anything under 12 hours a night leaves me dragging.. and I don't ever get 12 hours a night. We'll see what happens..

Later