till then.

wow. tons of stuff has happened that im not going to write about.
why you ask?
because im lazy.
yeah, its that simple.
headed to big d in 9 days.
happy joy!
i cant freakin wait!
its gonna be awesome.
just me and bestie for the weekend.
acting crazy.
i seriously need the break, so im reeally looking forward to this.
theres so much more i could write but dont have time right now.

later

i wanna go get my nails did ;)

i am STARVING!
i actually started eating food again today.
for the last week ive only been eating 1 meal a day. but im not losing weight that way. i think mainly because my body was storing that 1 meal i ate. so now im actually eating three(healthy) meals a day. i really want something to eat right now, but i refuse to eat this late!

ive been working out really hard this week, and now that im eating normally im hoping my body will fix itself and drop the lbs. i really want to lose 10 lbs this month. i know that sounds ridiculous, but to me that wouldnt be out of the ordinary. when i drop weight, i DROP WEIGHT. its been harder this time, so far, than i thought it would be though. usually when i try to lose weight i dont have much of a problem, but this time its different. mabye because this time im trying after ive had a kid. oh well. im determined and if i dont get it done in a month i will eventually get it done. i like eating healthier and working out anyway. i feel a lot better when i do. i have a lot more energy.

baby boys bday party is the day after..well, today now! i have so much crap to get done tomorrow, and ill have my nephew with me! luckily hubby is off work tomorrow so that will make it sooo much easier to get things in order! i just hope it doesnt rain saturday. that would suck! we'll be under a pavillion, but the kids wont be able to play on the playground. i just hope the rain holds off for those few hours were there!

my brain just stopped functioning properly and i cant even think of a complete sentence right now. im headed to bed

later

sleepy time sleepy time

why hello there.
im tired this morning. but whats new?
ive felt pretty good the last week.

i have a lot to do coming up. but its cool. it keeps me busy.
i have a bday for for my sweet little baby this weekend. and going to a dance recital for my nieces. hopefully it doesnt rain.
next weekend im having a garage sale on fri. and sat. and a bridal shower for bestie on sun.
the next weekend i have to go pick up my bridesmaids dress and shoes.
the 29th me and bestie are leaving for dallas for the weekend.
june 6th im giving bestie a lingerie shower.
june 12th were having the bachelorette party.
june 20th besties getting married.
and after that. i dont have anything. nothing. not one thing. that i can think of at least.
but for the next month and a half i have something every weekend.
i think its pretty great actually.
it gives me something to look forward to.
the only thing i have to worry about is paying bills and paying for everything else on top of bills.
but im not too worried.
im watching my nephew during the week and im getting paid for that.
i still have some yard work to finish up for the rents and im getting paid for that.
and my moms house is so disorganized she said she would pay me to clean it.
besides the fact that hubby works full time so we have a paycheck coming in every week.
surely we will make it.

right now, im sooo sleepy.

i hope i have enough energy to work out today
ive actually been doing really well with working out.
i started really trying this week.
and its working pretty good i think.
whenever the babies take a nap i get in there and work my butt off for about 30 or 45 min.
i think its going to pay off.
i want to lose 10 lbs. before the end of the month.
we will see what happens.

anyway, i have things to do.

later

no i dont even know her name. it doesnt matter

my son turned 1 today! i cant believe it! im actually not as upset about it as i thought id be. i figured id cry or have some kind of break down. i figured id sit here and go through all the things that have happened over the last year and feel like i missed out on something. but i havent. i guess being home with him has removed all of those possible feelings. in a way im happy hes growing up. i just hope once he gets out of diapers and off the bottle he stops growing and stays a baby forever. haha. we got him his own tiny little baby cake. he loved it! were having his big birthday this weekend. with all the family and friends and all that. its at a park so it should be fun. i think all the other little kids will have fun.

i finally feel alive today. i feel better than i have in days. im actually looking forward to all the things that are coming up. most of the things are going to take $$ but im not worried about it for once. i know itll all work out.

i have to get in bed.. tomorrows gonna be hell.
=)

later

ill stop the world and melt with you

today wasnt so bad.
i cleaned. but it was ok. alone time. music playing. not bad at all.

family reunion tomorrow. a family i dont even know. great. its hubbys step-dads family. i might know 4 of them. the ones ive met at christmas. cant wait..

baby boys bday is sunday. cant believe it. 1 yr old already. it blows my mind. where did all that time go? i feel like i missed it! his bday party isnt till next weekend, but im going to get him his own little cake for the day. i feel totally unprepared for the party. i have the jist of it. place, supplies, specific time set. but i need to actually make a solid plan for the day. im too busy thinking about me and besties trip at the end of the month. i really need to focus on this first. it comes first. its hard for me to take things in order. i tend to put things i want the most ahead and thats wrong. im too selfish. ill work on that.

really need to go to bed. my body hurts.

hope each day gets better for me.

later

its on

ready for dallas.
its going down.
cant wait.
all i need is some $$.
not to worried about it.

yay uh!

later