my son turned 1 today! i cant believe it! im actually not as upset about it as i thought id be. i figured id cry or have some kind of break down. i figured id sit here and go through all the things that have happened over the last year and feel like i missed out on something. but i havent. i guess being home with him has removed all of those possible feelings. in a way im happy hes growing up. i just hope once he gets out of diapers and off the bottle he stops growing and stays a baby forever. haha. we got him his own tiny little baby cake. he loved it! were having his big birthday this weekend. with all the family and friends and all that. its at a park so it should be fun. i think all the other little kids will have fun.
i finally feel alive today. i feel better than i have in days. im actually looking forward to all the things that are coming up. most of the things are going to take $$ but im not worried about it for once. i know itll all work out.
i have to get in bed.. tomorrows gonna be hell.
=)
later
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